...which is a snob and being aloof. there isn't enough warmth, he isn't personable. I NEED that in a guy. cody doesn't like him. i mean, i had anxiety being around him. that's not a good sign. it's kind of like the feeling that my dad was never really available for me, emotionally... that was when he was self absorbed in his own shit. the few times he was around, he did care but he did it in such an authoritative and softmanner that made it cold. bb is basically cold and sinister. that is his altar ego. but that stems from some kind of insecurity or inferiority complex. what is it? i should ask him more about him....that is if i ever talk to him again. i definitely won't be the one reaching. i won't ask him for any guitar questions. he wasn't interested in responding to my last message, what the fuck. he's got a girlfriend or some thang he found only in a couple weeks. i'm not impressed and i'm not an insecure girl that falls for that kind of shit. i'm so much better than that. i have way much more appeal and a lot more to give. his singing is kind of terrifying. weird and you can't understand what he's saying. he's good at expressing anguish, sensuality and sexuality, angst, and a very soft vulnerability. so soft that you know he's got issues. he's the insecure one. that is his developmental tendency. which brings me to question, at what age does our personality, tempermanent and tendencies form? we have dispositions, we may just be fated for certain things. but have some effect, power over it, even by manipulation. btw, him trying to be sexy is weird. having so much testosterone and masculiness in today's modern world is kind of different. so sexual and angry.....sexually angry? there is definite talent to be recognized, but in the guitar playing. not the singing or his appeal as an individual or person. he is impersonal and souless because his emotioins are either dark angry or very vulnerable.
we are still who we are.....when we knew each other. was it awkward? it was a little....
some friends take awhile for you to get to know....some you have to be kind with. i will just be a "friend."
kevin was discussing about what makes a great voice...he thinks it's the combination of both sad and happy that is in there. you need a good soul to be a singer. i think that is what it is. even though with amy winhouse she was a lost soul, but still good at heart.
when i get an impression of bryan...the first one is a guy that doesn't look like he has money or comes from privilege or a family of class. he is insecure about that. we are from different worlds. we don't know each other that well but we are curious about each other. there needs to be an honest vulnerability. he is not a flexible singer or a flexible person. you have to have that as a singer. rarely can you be equally good at both.
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